I don’t. Who keeps the Engagement Ring when the Wedding is Called Off?

Proposing to your partner is one of the scariest and most exciting things you will ever do and when they say yes it feels as though all of your dreams have suddenly come true. In most cases proposing and sliding that beautiful ring, that you have spent countless hours saving up for, onto her finger is the first step on a long and happy road together, however this is not always the case and before the wedding takes place the relationship may break down.

In these circumstances the question has to be asked – who gets to keep the ring?

Surprisingly the law is actually very clear on this matter with the decision in Papathanasopoulos v Vacopoulos setting a precedent. In this case his Honour Justice Smart found that where a wedding is called of by the woman and she refuses, without legal justification, to marry her fiancé she cannot keep the engagement ring and must return it. 

In this case Mr Vacopoulos had purchased a $15,250.00 diamond engagement ring for his partner Ms Papathanasopoulos and she had agreed to marry him. However soon after she called off the engagement with words to the effect of “the wedding is off, here take the ring, I don’t want it”, she then proceeded to remove the ring from her finger and put it on the coffee table in front of Mr Vacopoulos. He replied, stating, “I do not want the ring, it is a gift for you, you can keep it.”

Following this discussion Ms Papathanasolpoulos left, taking the ring with her. She subsequently asked her father to throw the ring in the garbage, which he apparently did.

Justice Smart in considering the circumstances stated: “The contract for want of a better word is rejected very shortly after it’s made and the consideration being the engagement ring ought to have been returned… It’s something that was given as a symbol, if nothing else, of the expected ongoing relationship between the parties. If she was rejecting him, then that quite plainly should have been returned.

His decision echoed that of Justice McCardie in Cohen v Sellar. In this case Justice McCardie stated:

  1. “If a woman who has received a ring in contemplation of marriage refuses to fulfill the conditions of the gift she must return it.
  2. If the man has, without a recognized legal justification, refused to carry out his promise of marriage, he cannot demand the return of the engagement ring.
  3. It matters not in law that the repudiation of the promise may turn out to the ultimate advantage of both parties. A judge must apply the existing law as to the limits of justification for breach.
  4. If the engagement to marry be dissolved by mutual consent, then in the absence of agreement to the contrary, the engagement ring and like gifts must be returned by each party to the other.”

What these decisions mean is that an engagement ring is to be considered as a ‘conditional gift’. A ‘conditional gift’ is where a gift is given to another person on the expectation that some future event or action will take place. This event or action is the wedding and until such time as this occurs and the condition is met, then if the engagement is broke off the ring must be returned to the purchaser.

If you require any assistance with family law matters, contact Dylan & Inns Gold Coast and Brisbane on 1300 36 32 10, or email hello@dylaninns.com.au.